Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize
