i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Randomize
