so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
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The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
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