Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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