i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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