Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(920): View more from Wisconsin

I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.

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(619): View more from California

woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.

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(650): View more from California

I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.

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(507): View more from Minnesota

Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party

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23 Disturbing Small-Town Horror Stories
Read it at the TFLN blog
(217): View more from Illinois

3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.

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(812): View more from Indiana

that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level

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(541): View more from Oregon

I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.

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(916): View more from California

Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up

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(843): View more from South Carolina

I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.

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