The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize
