While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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