What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
