Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
