the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
My breasts were aching with rage.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
