I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
