just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
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