I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don't even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It's what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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