guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
Randomize
