i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize