Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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