Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
He did a backflip because drugs
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