Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
If I die, sorry about rent.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
