She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I just googled if crying burns calories
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
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