You can't special order awesome
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Randomize