She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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