Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
just found out that she named her cat after me.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
