Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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