Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Randomize
