The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize