reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize
