you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
