Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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