my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Randomize