Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Randomize
