I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
A+ Viking dick
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
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