I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
