oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Randomize
