Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
