i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Randomize