Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
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