Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry toro101 hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(310): View more from California

Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.

Fav 20 2122 5693
share tweet
(402): View more from Nebraska

just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.

Fav 24 4772 1037
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(785): View more from Kansas

It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...

Fav 25 2756 4860
share tweet
(438): View more from Quebec

I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.

Fav 15 3530 1336
share tweet
(647): View more from Ontario

I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.

Fav 6 1550 729
share tweet
(509): View more from Washington

So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"

Fav 3 2407 739
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(720): View more from Colorado

ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.

(1-720): View more from Colorado

Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.

(720): View more from Colorado

I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.

(720): View more from Colorado

I rest my case.

Fav 10 2528 898
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(419): View more from Ohio

While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....

Fav 0 20 96
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(814): View more from Pennsylvania

I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life

Fav 0 46 3
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT