Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (661): View more from California

  Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.

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  (661): Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though. http://tfl.nu/ww5c
  Replies (9) Good night (908) Bad night (919)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.

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  (813): I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching. http://tfl.nu/tbhw
  Replies (30) Good night (871) Bad night (1692)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I just found out I have a small penis.

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?

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  (617): I just found out I have a small penis. (781): Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend? http://tfl.nu/6gqe
  Replies (23) Good night (685) Bad night (5451)
• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.

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  (734): I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again. http://tfl.nu/x69l
  Replies (24) Good night (1419) Bad night (5311)
• Favorite

  (605): View more from South Dakota

  woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.

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  (605): woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder. http://tfl.nu/fadr
  Replies (7) Good night (3412) Bad night (896)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.

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  (913): did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box. http://tfl.nu/h01u
  Replies (10) Good night (3300) Bad night (1680)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed

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  (570): I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed http://tfl.nu/7vip
  Replies (3) Good night (569) Bad night (1021)
• Favorite

  (256): View more from Alabama

  You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.

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  (256): You asked him for a membership to him and his dick. http://tfl.nu/mfxs
  Replies (5) Good night (1623) Bad night (702)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.

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  (512): We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again. http://tfl.nu/4ffb
  Replies (8) Good night (631) Bad night (1282)
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?

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  (708): Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life? http://tfl.nu/qn7b
  Replies (9) Good night (1026) Bad night (675)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!

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  (425): I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze! http://tfl.nu/6miw
  Replies (4) Good night (1029) Bad night (310)
• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.

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  (413): I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college. http://tfl.nu/4oip
  Replies (4) Good night (671) Bad night (273)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.

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  (314): Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks. http://tfl.nu/ddm7
  Replies (0) Good night (278) Bad night (530)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless

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  (330): dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless http://tfl.nu/pgmn
  Replies (7) Good night (527) Bad night (446)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT

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  (443): i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT http://tfl.nu/1m2q
  Replies (4) Good night (424) Bad night (252)

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