i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING