How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize