She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
whose ass print is on the piano?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
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