think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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