wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
