Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Randomize