Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Randomize
