I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize