So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
