so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
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