It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
