That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
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