I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I believe in your delicious
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Randomize
