He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
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